Phinding Phriends

The world would be a lonely place without friends.  But what really is a friend.  Looking back on my time here on terra firma I can say that I have had many acquaintances or people whom I know and who know me. But friendship, thats something deeper. If we take a look at what friendship really is, we begin to see something else.

Ive got about 250 "friends" on facebook which I would say is about average. I wonder how many of those people really care about me, its probably less than 5%, and thats ok.  Building friendship takes a lot of work and time, and to share that with 250 people would be more than a full time job.  They say (not sure who "they" are but "they" are always saying stuff) that someone with 2 real friends is better off than most,  I would consider myself better off than most.

Ive had so many people in my life come and go, stay and leave, spend some time and then depart.  We all serve some purpose in this world and people come in and out at different times of our lives but there have been some that have stayed a long time.  We've gone different routes and sometimes have dramatic differences but we are still friends, good friends.

So what really is this friendship, what makes it special?  Some would define it as companionship, but I would argue that friendship and companionship are two completely different things.  A true friend makes Christ present, whether they are a professed Christian or not.  They make sacrifices to be with you, they make sacrifices for your benefit.  They share kind words, they share their earnings, they share food, they share smiles, they share their time amongst many other things.  Friendship is sharing all that you have and receiving it from someone else in return.  Friendship, to me, sounds a lot like love.  But I think there are some differences.  Love goes beyond friendship.  When the reciprocal nature of friendship is lost, a person has a choice to let love take over or let the friendship die.  Love does not care about the outcome, it gives all for the benefit of another, it is a Christian example in the purest sense.

A friend of mine explained how its so easy to pick up where you left off with a friend whom you haven't seen in a while.  He said your real friends stay on your mind and you often think about them, your friendship lives on in your mind. After not seeing a true friend in some time, you can pick up where you left off because of the place they hold in your heart and mind.  This is a good way to know who really cares about you, if the conversation flows and everything comes natural, there is a good chance that that relationship is a keeper.

St. Francis DeSales describes true friendship thusly: "Friendship varies according to these communications, and they vary according to that which people have to communicate. If men share false and vain things, their friendship will be false and vain; if that which is good and true, their friendship will be good and true, and the better that which is the staple of the bond, so much the better will the friendship be. That honey is best which is culled from the choicest flowers, and so friendship built upon the highest and purest intercommunion is the best. And just as a certain kind of honey brought from Pontus is poisonous, being made from aconite, so that those who eat it lose their senses, so the friendship which is based on unreal or evil grounds will itself be hollow and worthless."




Im very grateful for all of my friends, where ever they are.  Thanks for making my life what it is.